Best Text Message This Year
The Small Boy Wonder has been to the see the Red Hot Chilli Peppers. He was very excited about the prospect of going in the mosh pit. I suspect (no, I hope, I truly hope) his experience has not been typical of the average concert-goer
We rather took our eye off the ball on this one, and agreed that he could go without realising it was on a school night. We knew he would be back very late, but the Big Boy Wonder was staying and assured us he would still be awake when his brother got home. We could therefore go to bed. Before he left for the gig, we asked SBW not to have a shower when he got in. The shower is quite noisy and would probably wake us up.
I was just at that point of falling into a deep sleep when we got a text. It read:
“I’m gonna have to shower cos someone chucked a bottle of piss and most of it hit me, I can’t sleep covered in piss x”
We found out the next day that this happened during the first song. He’d had to go through the rest of the set and a two hour journey home in this state. Nice. At least it was in somebody else’s car.
It also came to light that one of the girls he was with had not liked the experience of the mosh, and at the end of that first song insisted they all abandon the front row position which they had secured by getting there hours early. Somehow they all then got separated and the SBW hadn’t been allowed back in the mosh pit.
All in all his evening hadn’t quite lived up to expectation.
I asked him what had most impacted his enjoyment – spending the evening covered in somebody else’s piss or missing out on the mosh pit experience.
He looked at me as with that level of total disdain known only to teenagers as he replied that – obviously– it wasn’t the piss.